HoHoHos Don't Marry Anyone, Even Christmas

Ho Ho Fucking Ho!
What a crock of shit
We all work for Santa Claus
We've had enough
We quit!
'Cause we do all the fuckin' work
while he stars in the show
Stick your Christmas up your ass
Ho Ho Fucking Ho!

Well, I'd have to say after all it was a good Christmas. I got a gym membership and a New Years outfit and a toaster and a blender and a bunch of fake green pearl costume jewelry and underwear with high heels on them. I had to work, which wasn't half bad, considering I made nearly $20 an hour.

And Now When I Clap My Hands, You Will Wake Up and Maul the Cutest Guy in the Audience

I have always been fascinated at the idea of being hypnotized. Not just to lose weight or quit smoking or remember what I saw my grandma doing to my first boyfriend in the den that Christmas, although all of those would be fabulous...No, I'm primarily interested in the public embarrassment factor. Yes, put some people on a stage, convince them they're on fire or in love with you or a country singer. You're in for hours of entertainment, and everyone knows there's no better entertainment than the kind at someone else's expense.

That said, I've been gone for a long time.

Carly, flaming Rum Punch is off. KLaLa, I lost my Theatre contact sheet, so I couldn't call you on your birthday, but I celebrated in your absense, don't hate be because I supposedly forgot. I didn't, okay. Justin, you don't ever read this, or if you do, you never comment.

Oh, yeah, I am having the periods of two months this week, so don't think I'm just being bitchy. I am just...being bitchy. By the way, there's a really cool tampon company called ditties. Love them. Their website, linked in the title, has a bowling game where the bowling pins are tampons. Too funny.

Carly, you and I and my roommate and my few beautiful friends will get together to celebrate Saturnalia and have flaming rum punch, but it's not going to be a crazy time like I thought. KLaLa, I wish you could come. You chould try reeeally hard. Maybe we can call Sahron Baron to come and have a few drinks with us. It turns out she was the first girlfriend of one of my best friends here in town. Odd.

Anyway. I love and have missed you guys. There's not much to report, no boys, no acting, no money. On the other hand, Christmas is coming. More importantly New Years is coming. Best of all, CHUNT is coming! Also I just had Channukah and my one month anniversary of my apartment and I had croquetas at gernika and Tom was brilliant in a play that was just like my job. But more about croquetas and plays later. Right now I have to write about movies, as I've been invited to join The Reel Deal, although I know nothing of movies.